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Books : Humour
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Sometimes, the hardest part of finding love is keeping a straight face...
For Jamie Newman, being a single guy isn't proving to be much fun, especially when confronted with a sexually belligerent divorcee and a goddess so far out of his league she might as well be a different species.
Mind you, being a girl in search of love isn't a bowl of cherries either. Just ask Laura McIntyre, who's recently contended with a horny estate agent on a quest for light relief and a rabid mountain bike enthusiast with a penchant for displaying his genitals.
When Jamie and Laura bump into one another (quite literally) it looks like their luck may have changed - but sometimes finding the right person is only the start of your problems...
Based on real-life tales of dating disaster and relationship blunders, Love... From Both Sides is a warts-and-all romantic comedy for everyone who knows how tricky (and occasionally ridiculous) the quest for love can be.
Reviews:
"I can't count the amount of times I laughed out loud whilst reading and I love that it was based on real life dating stories." - Amazon reviewer
"Its funny, sweet, excruciating and touching all at the same time. I really felt for the two main characters and was cheering them on, hoping they would work things out in the end." - Amazon Reviewer"I have never read what I class
Though Debra Webb has distinguished herself as an author of romantic suspense, she began her career writing sassy and spicy romances for Kensington’s Precious Gems. For the first time these heartfelt stories, which were sold only in Wal-Mart for one short month, are available as ebooks.
Connor McFerrin is a savvy businessman and he is accustomed to being the boss. His Atlanta based development company is a top southern business and he intends to keep it that way. When he expands into Huntsville, Alabama, he runs into trouble with a tree-hugger who has no regard for his vision of progress. She is outrageously stubborn and incredibly beautiful and she is driving him out of his mind!
Free Renzetti will do whatever it takes to salvage and protect historic homes, including going up against the sexiest man she has ever laid eyes on. Somehow she must make this career-focused man see that he desperately needs to stop and smell the roses!
Thirty-something Geordie girl Aimee Anderson has just been dumped by her fiancé, Robbie – on the night of their engagement party. So, in an attempt to get over both the relationship, and the rather embarrassing way in which it ended, Aimee and her best friend Jemma are going on the holiday of a lifetime which, in their case, is a trip around the Mediterranean on a mid-budget cruise liner. And there’s only one thing Aimee’s determined to do on this holiday, and that’s forget about Robbie and have some fun.
Danny Johnson is one-fifth of 90’s boy band Bon Voyage, and they’re about to make a comeback. In the middle of the Mediterranean. On the same cruise as Aimee. And Aimee used to love Bon Voyage. Aimee used to love Danny Johnson…
Back in the day, Danny had been the band’s “bad boy”, and whilst the years haven’t damaged his looks in any way, his post-pop-star life is in a bit of a mess. About to be divorced from Newcastle party princess and Z-list celebrity wannabe, Davina Black, and harbouring a secret from the past about the real reason Bon Voyage split up, Danny just isn’t sure if being back in a boy band is what he really wants. But one thing he does want is some fun. For the next two weeks, at least.
So, when Aimee finally meets the man of her dreams – literally – could they possibly have some fun together? Or is something – or somebody – about to stand in the way of Aimee having a holiday to remember?
Bon Voyage – a romantic comedy; a story of boy bands, broken dreams, and love on the ocean wave…
Michelle Betham is also the author of the edgy and sexy rock 'n' roll romance 'See You At The Show', the light-hearted romantic comedy 'Too Much Trouble in Paradise', and the epic Hollywood romance, ‘No Matter What’.
Follow Michelle on Twitter @michellebetham
Follow her blog at michellebethamwriter.blogspot.co.uk
Now on the Kindle, 'Goodbye, Pert Breasts' has longer diary entries than those published online, as well as loads more chapters all giving excellent practical advice for dads in a way that will make you laugh until you cry!
This book is loved by new and experienced parents alike: dads can relate to Ben's hilarious anecdotes and observations on pregnancy, while mums relish the opportunity of reading this window into a man's mind during this life-changing time!
"Funny. . .a no-holds-barred account of what it's REALLY like to be a parent!" - Prima Baby Magazine
"Personal, witty and reassuring." - Pregnancy & Birth Magazine
"Ben’s anecdotes and insights are the stuff of a stand up genius!" - Book Reviews for Mums
"Every prospective dad will love this!" - Fathermag.com
"Ben keeps us laughing…it’s a wonderful take on pregnancy from the eyes of the father and a great read for expectant parents and long-time parents." - The Good Men Project
"A funny, fast-paced, clever, and unusual mystery that will have readers clamoring for more. Sheer delight." --Carolyn Hart
"A thoroughly delightful debut. Bright, breezy, and witty. I couldn't put it down."--Tamar Myers
The truth about what happened in 1949 went to Paul Fischer's grave... Too bad his body didn't!
Advertising copywriter Leigh Koslow doesn't pack heat--just a few extra pounds. And she doesn't go looking for trouble. When she moved into her cousin Cara's refurbished Victorian house, she wasn't planning on discovering a corpse--certainly not one that had been embalmed ten years before. But as anyone in the small Pittsburgh borough of Avalon could tell her, her cousin's house has a history attached. A history dating back to two mysterious deaths in the summer of 1949.
Someone wants Leigh and Cara out of the house--someone who has something to hide. But that someone doesn't know Leigh's impetuous cousin, and when Cara digs her heels in, Leigh looks to her old college chum, local policewoman Maura Polanski, for help. But the answers the trio find only point to more questions. Were the scandalous deaths of fifty years ago really an accident and a suicide? Or were they murder?
The nearer the women get to the truth, the more desperate someone becomes. Because some secrets are better off kept. Especially when they hit close to
“You are in Paris, the City of Love. You must not be so controlled. Here, have another glass. I promise you, it will not hurt.”
When 29-year-old event planner Chloe Turner wakes up penniless and without a passport in the Plaza Athénée Hotel in Paris, she only has a few fleeting memories of Claude, the suave French man who convinced her to have that extra glass of wine before taking all of her possessions and slipping out the door. As the overly organized, go-to gal for her three drama queen younger sisters, her anxiety-ridden father, and her needy clients, Chloe is normally prepared for every disaster that comes her way. But with her wedding to her straight-laced, lawyer fiancé back in DC only days away and a French con-man on the loose with her engagement ring, this is one catastrophe she never could have planned for.
As Chloe tries to figure out a way home, she runs into an even bigger problem—the police are after her due to suspicious activity now tied to her bank account. Chloe's only hope at retrieving her passport and clearing her name lies in the hands of a rugged, undercover agent named Julien who has a few secrets of his own. As Chloe follows this mysterious, and—although she doesn't want to admit it—sexy French man on a wild chase through the sun-kissed countryside of France, she discovers a magical world she never knew existed and has to decide if the perfectly ordered life she’s built for herself back home is really what she wants after all.
At the heart of this riotous laugh-a-paragraph farce that will delight members of amateur dramatic societies everywhere, lies a forgotten village in a remote valley where the 'real valley folk' live, including Cuthbert, the village undertaker, impressario of the shambolic annual theatre production, and holy fool; Margery, the local beauty and mother of the Mafia twins whose constant creative disruption provides a reliable source of hazard and misadventure; the anonymous milkman whose flashing teeth can fell a woman at fifty paces; Percy the gardener whose still waters run curiously if not necessarily deep; and the regulars at the Mandrake Arms who drink to remember, drink to forget as plots and plans flourish in their midst.
Suddenly into this by-water of rural oblivion bursts a band of newcomers who have taken up residence of the seigneurial Mandrake Hall – Henry, a prominent media reporter and his daughter who is more horse than her horse; Henry's brother, Ronald, an adventurer, a mercenary and a sometime crook; and the unreconstituted Captain and his much put-upon wife Elspeth.
What are these rank and unlikely outsiders doing in these obscure parts and what are they looking for as they vigorously comb the village and the extensive network of tunnels built beneath it?
One clue is the persistent legend that the Bard himself, William Shakespeare, was once employed as a tutor up at the Hall (thus the annual village play) and that there might still be fragments of his early work – a fumbling politically-incorrect piece – waiting to be discovered.
Fame and fortune may follow, but corpses will be dug up first.
PG-RATED FUN
BAH, HUMBUG! (A Romantic Comedy Christmas Novella)
Lexi Anderson is an up-and-coming, Martha Stewart-type TV hostess whose two kids love the Jared Strong adventure novels, which happen to be written by their new neighbor, Kyle Miller.
For the first time in his writing career, Kyle has writer’s block--until he sees the snowman on his lawn and realizes it’s the perfect solution to his plot problem. He digs in and discovers two things: one, his villain’s weapon will fit inside a snowman's body, and two, this particular snowman was supposed to be the backdrop for Lexi’s next show.
From this improbable beginning comes friendship, but can there be a happy ending for a woman who is afraid to get close again and a man who has shadows from his childhood?
Families join together and hearts are healed as this couple goes walking in a winter wonderland.
It's a novella of about 100 pages. The paperback version will be available soon.
NEW RELEASES:
If you enjoyed this book, consider signing up for my new releases email list at www.BooksByHeatherHorrocks.com.
OTHER BOOKS BY THIS AUTHOR:
FUNNY MYSTERIES:
The Who-Dun-Him Inn series: Snowed Inn (#1)
The Bad Mothers Club series: The Bad Mothers Club (#1)
ROMANTIC COMEDIES & SUSPENSE:
Bah, Humbug! (99-cent Christmas novella)
Baby Mine, Old Money, No Sudden Moves
The Chick Flick Clique series (2012 ):
While You Were Stranded #1
Bear Foot in the Park #2
My Spare Lady #3
The LDS series:
How to Stuff a Wild Zucchini
Old Maid of Honor
Dinosaur Ball (novella)
You Just Turned 8 (a baptism book)
INSPIRATIONAL:
Women & Men Who Knew the Mortal Messiah
OTHER FEATURES:
Full working Table of Contents.
After several decades of looking for true love and never finding it, aging model and lingerie designer, Alexa Ranger, has finally given up the search. A couple years ago, she got tired of the game completely and just stopped dating. Now friends and family keep her mostly content, so it’s shocking at 50 yrs old to find herself suddenly wanting a sex life again. It’s even more shocking to be attracted to a much younger man this time. She definitely thinks Casey Carter is sexy, but not handling her own age well, Alexa just can’t get passed their twelve year age difference to even consider a fling. Not that it matters anyway, anything resembling a normal dating relationship is totally out of the question because Casey is related to and living with her daughter’s boyfriend. The very last thing Alexa needs is yet another talk-show worthy drama in her already complicated life, no matter how amazing Casey’s kisses make her feel.
For a couple of years, 38 yr old, medically retired Marine, Casey Carter, believed his military injury had made him impotent. Having lost his wife to cancer, he hadn’t exactly been worried about the problem. Most days walking with cane was enough challenge for him. But now that he was ready to move on with his life, he had become more worried when none of the females his cousin brought around held any interest for him. So the last woman in the world he expected to start his engine revving again was the mother of his cousin's girlfriend. Even at fifty, Alexa is drop-dead gorgeous, and his libido certainly keeps reminding him she is the first woman he has wanted in a long, long time. Ironically, the more Casey gets to know and like Alexa, he finds out desiring the older woman is the easiest part. Jaded and cynical about love, Alexa is a difficult woman to convince of anything, but her kisses are all the proof he needs that they belong together. The former Marine decides his next mission is figuring out how to fit himself into her life.
Lynda Renham's newest and best novel - Annabel Lewis (Bels) has two days to get to her wedding in Rome but her journey is beset with one disaster after another as fate takes its turn. Will the stranger she meets on the way get her to her wedding on time or will he change her life forever? Come with Bels on her humorous romantic journey to see if she marries Mr Right or if destiny takes her in different direction.
The capture of Osama Bin Laden, the royal wedding, Jeremy Clarkson, Ryan Giggs and the plight of the travelling-folk, this hilarious diary takes you through real events during 2010 and 2011 as seen by a rather opinionated single mum.
Woven in with the current affairs commentary is the story of Single-Mum, The Teenager, Annabelle and Hector the dog.
The diary picks up real parenting situations and real problems faced by anybody attempting to bring order to the chaos that is the life of a single parent.
Single-Mum makes no apology for the scrapes she gets herself into and as a result, her diary is a reassuring, laugh-out-loud, journey through 2010 and 2011.
Romance can be a hairy business--especially when you're a werewolf.
As the owner of Get a Mate Dating Service, Rylie is more than happy to step in and lend a hand to lonely lycanthropic hearts all over town. No matter how hopeless Rylie might be in finding her own soul mate, she has a knack for helping others find theirs.
Convinced that she is stuck with a family curse, Rylie is positive she will never find her true love. But when drool-worthy Jack Chandler shows up at her door, Rylie wonders if maybe the curse is finally broken.
But Rylie's life is about to become complicated courtesy of the after-dark crowd. When she begins receiving strange notes and harassment from a jilted client, events careen out of control.
Jack knows she's more hassle than he can handle. What he doesn't know is whether she's seriously in trouble . . . or simply delusional.
More books available now by Rose Pressey:
How to Date a Vampire (Rylie Cruz Series, Book 2)
Me and My Ghoulfriends (Larue Donavan Series, Book 1)
Ghouls Night Out (Larue Donavan Series, Book 2)
No Shoes, No Shirt, No Spells (Mystic Cafe Series, Book 1)
Rock 'n' Roll is Undead (Veronica Mason Series, Book 1)
Coming soon:
Untitled (Mystic Cafe, Book 2)
Untitled (Larue Donavan, Book 3)
Spells, Demons, and Rock 'n' Roll (Veroni
In this hilarious parody of Fifty Shades of Grey, our heroine, Annabelle Stilletto from Jersey City, New Jersey, meets her dream guy, the rich and handsome Vinnie Griso, the heir to the Vinnie's Auto Parts empire. She falls for his seductive charms and discovers the secret pleasures of domination as she becomes "black and blue." (This is the first installment in the parody)
Everyone can see the Queen's smart coats and dresses, but what does she wear underneath, particularly for a school visit? Through the eyes of a girl hoping for a school visit by the Queen, this book reveals the range of royal underwear, from garden party and Christmas speech knickers to the VIP (Very Important Pair) for the Parliament opening.
Nick Spalding is back... and this time he's airborne!
By popular demand (and because those counselling sessions won't pay for themselves) Nick returns in the sequel to Life... With No Breaks - with a new collection of anecdotes, stories and asides.
This time he's writing at 40,000 feet... and what better way is there to kill forty eight hours on a round trip to Australia than holding another conversation with you?
Sit back - don't worry, we're in Business Class so the seats are comfortable - put your feet up, and laugh out loud as Nick wends his merry way through a plethora of subjects, including age, hobbies, crime, dating the wrong women and pretending to be a banana (among many other things).
After you've read Life... On A High, you may never look at the rest of the world the same way again!
Reviews:"I can only imagine that Nick has a team of elves working through the night on his books - how else can one person write a book as funny as this in forty-eight hours? I am going to have to rethink the way I write..." - Stephen Leather, best selling author<
"He's done it again! What a brilliant, funny, enjoyable read. Well done on writing yet another great book. Can't wait for the next one!" - Amazon Reviewer
"Another rollicking rollercoaster ride of embarrassing events and amusing anecdotes." - Amazon Reviewer
A monster at the bottom of a hill eats all of the garbage generated by the town on top of the hill. This provides two important benefits: The monster is happy with plenty to eat and the town stays nice and clean. Unfortunately, as the town grows, so does the amount of garbage the monster must consume. He gets bigger - and he starts burping. This is, as you can probably guess, a bit unsightly and stinky. In the end, the kids figure out how to solve the problem - despite the nasty mayor's doubts and objections.
"I bring you tidings of... DAMMIT!"
With those few words, Jack Lynch's world would change forever. The nerdy guy from Hammond High has returned for his twentieth reunion. He's rich, successful, and ready to re-claim the girl who got away: Rori McLeary.
There's just one small problem... Jack is also dead. But with the help of an angel in training, his mom, and the rockin' body of his former arch-nemesis, Jack is still going to get the girl.
He has three days to convince Rori to love him. He's got the body he never had, the brains he always had, and Norman the geek angel on his side.
What could possibly go wrong?
*NOTE: This is a short, sweet romance of 15,826 words.